Nurturing My Middle's Heart

Yesterday I ordered a book titled, Transforming the Difficult Child: The Nurtured Heart Approach.

It makes me feel bad to admit that because by choosing the title I am classifying my daughter as "difficult." It is also a bit embarrassing to confess that I need help parenting my own child. But I guess I have to let all that go and instead feel proud that I am taking steps towards transformation. And I like the sound of "the nurtured heart approach."

Funny that I am struggling with my daughter being that she reminds me so much of myself. We are both middle children. She is, like I was, extremely quiet at school and an angel when she is visiting a friend's house - but the true child comes out at home.

I was constantly pushing my siblings to the limit. I used to sit pleasantly at family dinners with an innocent smile on my face while under the table I was giving my brother intense snake bites on his arm.

Although I don't remember this particular moment, my younger sister gives accounts of when I babysat her and made her play jail, which included locking her in the back hall and only allowing her bread and water.

My mom even admits the story of one time when she was vacuuming the stairs and I came up behind her. Over her shoulder she asked, "what honey?" And I said, "no, it's me Jenny." I was so accustomed to being in trouble that I assumed she had mistaken me for my brother to call me honey. She was crushed when she realized my assumption and remembers this as a defining moment as a parent.

So now I wear her shoes.

Last night we went to see the movie Ramona and Beezus. I brought my girls with no expectations of adult enjoyment but ended up in tender tears. The dad character was inspiring to me in the way he handled the antics of the rambunctious middle child Ramona. It definitely appeared to be the nurtured heart approach.

I am looking forward to my Amazon package!