Seasonal Delights

The holidays are here and I couldn't be more excited! I'm just a festive kind of girl. But I really wish everyone shared my merriness. Honestly, I am a little disappointed by some of my friends lately - so much complaining about shopping and cooking and cleaning and waiting in lines. I get it - it's all a little crazy - but here are a few of the things that help keep me in the right state of mind.

There is something magical about tiny, twinkling bulbs wrapped around winter's naked branches. Especially with the glass walls of downtown as the backdrop. It almost makes it worth it to leave work in the blackness of night. I equally love the giant inflatable snowman the springs from my front lawn each night. My daughter picked it out and my husband put it up as a surprise, which makes it awesome.

I savor every buttery morsal of Christmas that I can get my teeth on. Not a gingerbread, truffle, spritz or peanut blossom is safe around me. I even like the coconut things that everyone else passes over. And they taste even better when dressed in sprinkles by a child. These adorable reindeer were made by my mom and daughter. They tasted just as good as they look.

December is the one time of year that I love going to the mailbox. The kids and I quickly tear through the envelopes to find the prizes inside. We take the time to talk about each person or family we receive cards from - always great conversation. I know Christmas cards aren't doing the environment any good, but I love them anyway. There is something special about having my friends' and family's smiling faces taped on my kitchen door. I usually keep them up through March.

And, of course, if all else fails, its impossible not to love celebrating Christmas with little people who still believe in the big guy in red. Their excitement is beyond contagious. I set them loose to decorate and wrap - who cares if the tree has 90 percent on the ornaments on the front lower half? The joy of the season is completely alive in them and it is wonderful!

For me, this package says it all.

Head Above Water

When I created this blog my intention was to write about the good in my life, because that's where I want to focus my energy. Hence the title "Choose To Live Lovely."

The only problem is there are times when things don't feel so lovely and it makes me feel a bit unauthentic to only be talking positive on my blog. Sometimes it feels like a better title may have been "Head Above Water," or something of that flavor.

I guess the purpose of this post is to let you know that, yes, I have bad days and I'm not always so optimistic, but I'm sticking with the (mostly) good stuff on this blog because that was the whole point. I believe positive thinking goes a long way and writing it down goes even further.

This reminds me of a cool product called The Intention Box, created by a local woman named Ann Drew Yu. I love her tag line: "Where Intention Goes, Energy Flows."

So, I'm going to keep my focus where my heart always is - even on the bad days. My hope is that my words may help spark even a little positive energy within those who choose to read them. There is something very gratifying about the writing process for me.

Kitty Bliss

I am watching my cat dozing by the window, lazily tossing his tail from side to side as if in response to pleasant thoughts. His tabby coat glistens pure gold in the afternoon sun that heats the glass he rests against. His fat tummy slowly rises and falls as he breathes in, out, in, out, in, out. So relaxed. So at peace.

I wonder what, if anything, he’s thinking about. Is he day dreaming about chasing small prey through the back of our wooded lot? Is he remembering the good rubdown I gave him last night? Is he basking in the thrill of victory after his morning spat with his sister?

Sometimes I am envious of his leisurely life. No responsibility. No obligations. Would I be bored? Is he bored? If only I had the chance to know.

The fact that he has caused me to pause and think about this at all makes me smile. He’s reminded me, even if only for the moment, to slow down, exhale and enjoy. One minute of pure kitty bliss.

Like New

A quick follow up on my last post. The girls found the garage sale staging area in the basement and brought a bunch of toys back upstairs. They are all excited to play with the "new" toys.

Hmmm... This isn't all bad. Maybe my strategy just needs to be rotation.

25% Off At The Zimmermans

The curse of online shopping is most definitely the resulting fire hose of email sales promotions. At this moment, Toys R Us is particularly driving me crazy. I’m sorry; I’m just not interested in your deal of the day AGAIN!

I’m simply not inspired to shop. And it’s not about spending money. I hate buying gifts just to give gifts. I don’t like the trend my family has taken of basically telling each other what to buy. Certain unnamed family members (by marriage) literally provide SKU numbers for the gifts they want. A couple years ago they even bought the gifts and just asked us to give them the cash. That’s when I surrendered to the fact that we have very different ideas of Christmas and I’m not going to let them spoil mine.

Moreover, I just have no desire to add more junk to our overflowing house. I am telling my family to please not buy me gifts, and really, the kids need nothing (read: keep it small, I’m begging you!).

Instead of standing in line for Zhu Zhu Pets or seeking out the best deal, this year I am spending my time purging. I have set the goal to reduce the contents of my house by 25 percent. (Really, it’s that bad.)

I’ve been honest here before that household organization is not my strong point. (Remember my tribute to Organized Audrey?) It was no joke when I said I am serious about it this time. I have spent a lot of time planning what needs to be done, and the bottom line is that there is no way to maintain this house in an orderly manner when it is completely packed with stuff. Really, how can I organize a closet that I can’t even shut?!

I have set a deadline of May 1 to complete this project. Our city-wide garage sale is the following weekend and my neighbors can look forward to a quarter of our possessions piled on the driveway up for grabs.

I’ve already started on the kitchen and the kids toys, and it’s been incredibly refreshing work so far. I’m not brave enough yet to post before and after pictures, but here’s a shot of the recently decluttered toy cabinet. The board games alone were a several-hour project – finding missing pieces and taping up boxes. Not fun work when I was drowning in piles of homeless junk, but worth the effort in the end. Sometimes now I open the cabinet just to look at the perfectly stacked boxes. (Maybe I need to get a life?)

I am quite confident that I purged a quarter of the toys from the main level of our house last weekend – and all of those I removed had not been played with in at least a year! I truly believe I could cut a fourth of our possessions without anyone in my family noticing. But I can guarantee that they will notice the result. I think it's going to be better than Christmas!

Enter Stage Light

I consider myself an optimist, but winter is one thing I have a hard time seeing the bright side of. Because of the darkness.

I work full time in a cubicle with no windows, so winter means I only see the sun on weekends. About 20 hours a week of daylight - down from over 50 in the summer.

Experience has taught me that embracing the dark and cold just isn't going to happen, so I don't even try any more. I've found a source of light besides the sun to help nurture my starving soul through the winter months - the Twin Cities fabulous arts scene.

There is always something new to see, to hear, to experience, to learn. It's almost worth the sacrifice of being shut in.

And you really don't need to spend a lot of money to get a full dose of culture. You can enjoy an entire season of the arts for about the cost of one snowmobile suit!

My family kicked off the dark season with November's free first Saturday event at the Walker Art Center. We helped build a reflective sculpture, explored the exhibits, and rocked out with The Commandos. We were even blessed with some sunshine for running around the Sculpture Garden.

It's days like these that make me thankful that I share my hometown with Target Corporation headquarters. The retail monster sponsors regular free events at all of the major museums and even offers free family shows at Orchestra Hall (available on a lottery basis).

Speaking of orchestra, the Saint Paul Chamber Orchestra offers a fabulous deal for young adults called Club2030. It allows us non-traditional patrons (I assume that's how the under-40 crowd is classified) to purchase best available seats to any show for only $10.

Community theater is another superb option for affordable entertainment. During November I took my daughters to an outstanding high school production of The Music Man, as well as Fiddler on the Roof at Phipps Theater in Hudson, WI. I have already purchased tickets for the whole family to see Click, Clack, Moo: Cows That Type at Stages Theatre in Hopkins this spring - I am SO excited to see one of our favorite kids books on stage!

Of course, when I can swing it I still love to make it to the Broadway-quality productions that frequent the cities and the Tony-winning Children's Theatre Company, but I have to stick with what the budget allows. Sometimes great deals, like two-for-ones, are available and I am always keeping my eyes open.

Last month I also had a chance to escape to First Ave for the Mason Jennings show. I love to see a local act becoming so successful. Mason's new album, Blood of Man, is phenomenal live. (He's coming again in December - just saying...)

The Twin Cities has a constant stream of awesome bands flowing through town, most of which you can catch for under $20. Sometimes it almost seems like robbery the shows are so good. Although, I will admit that I splurged and bought U2 tickets as a little early Christmas gift to myself. Occasionally you just have to drop the bucks. And I figure anticipation is half the fun, so I will get my money's worth just by having to wait until June for the show!

I'm glowing a little just thinking about it.

Gratitude

I can't let November close without taking the time to express gratitude for all that makes up my wonderful life.

On Thanksgiving, after we cleared the excessive leftovers from the table, I sat with my grandma putting away the good silverware in her storage chest. As I marveled over the tiny relish forks, it occurred to me what a bountiful life we live. Not only do we have plenty (and delicious) food to eat, we actually have a variety of special utensils to use for each of the many courses.

Spoiled. That's what we are. Completely spoiled. And we shouldn't forget it.

When I reflect upon all I am grateful for, I need to specifically mention the following things:

• My husband, for accepting me as I am, always, and being here no matter what.
• My children, for making me smile every day.
• My many treasured friends, each of whom is a special soul mate in a different way.
• My job, for allowing me to provide for my family and enjoy myself at the same time.
• My parents, siblings and extended family, for their unconditional love and support.
• My home and all the comforts that come with it, for being just that - home.

You get the idea.

Appreciate what you have and say it out loud - especially to those you love.

If you are a twitter user, check out @iamgrateful4, a collective gratitude journal. If you ever need a pick-me-up, it's a darn good place to start.

And next time you say the words "thank you," think about what you are saying and why. There is no practice more fulfilling than gratitude.

One Phone Call From Our Knees

I recently heard Mat Kearney’s new song “Closer to Love” on the radio and I was struck by a line that I can’t stop thinking about:

“I guess we're all one phone call from our knees.”

Although the song overall really isn’t my taste, that line moved me.

A few years ago that line would have put me in panic mode. I could get cancer. My husband could die in a car crash. My children could never make it home from school.

I used to worry about these types of things a lot. A LOT. Like, I lost many nights of sleep. But, somehow – with age, I guess – I have been able to shift my mindset so I no longer waste my energy worrying much about things I can’t control.

Instead, I am aware that any of these things could happen and so I am trying to live every day to the fullest. It is a guiding principle in many choices for me.

For example, last year when we were planning our budget there was a chunk of money that we could either use for new flooring (which we desperately want) or a family vacation to sunny Florida. We went with the latter.

My exact thinking at the time was “I will never lie on my death bed and wish I would have had nicer floors, but this special time with my kids will stay with me forever.”

Good choice. A year after the trip, I still wouldn’t trade the memories for anything.

I guess I was primed to be thinking about this when I heard the Mat Kearney song because I recently read a book with a similar message. In “The Year of Magical Thinking,” Joan Didion tells the heart-breaking true story of the year she lost her husband to a heart attack while her daughter spent months in the ICU. Throughout the beautifully crafted memoir, Didion repeats one line:

“You sit down to dinner and life as you know it ends.”

When I first started reading the book I thought to myself, “Can you handle this one, Jen?” I am very aware of how close to the edge of sanity I was when I first became a mom and I used to worry for hours and days about things like my children landing in the ICU. And my own father is a heart attack survivor.

I decided to carry on with the reading and I’m so glad I did. Much to my surprise, the book did not cause me to worry. It only strengthened my feelings of optimism and gratitude, because even though some things in my life may not be perfect right now, all the truly important things are just fine.

I guess a little reminder once in a while is a very nice thing.

Life is good. I know that could change in an instant. So, for now, I’m going to soak up the sun.

Blessings Overload

The past week I have been struck by a condition I like to call Blessings Overload. I had so many wonderful things happening in my life that I could hardly keep up with them all.

In seven days time I sang karaoke at a dive bar, went to a fabulous concert, ate dinner out with two different groups of friends, participated in a parent-child event at church, met two different friends for coffee, attended a Girl Scouts theater event with my daughter, picked out pumpkins at the patch with the family, celebrated my nephew's birthday, and went to a family Halloween party at our friends' home. That's on top of all the normal stuff, like working 40 hours, chauffeuring kids to dance class and Sunday School, homework, housework, etc.

I am not complaining - not at all - but I am tired. And that's why I have been absent from the blog for an extended stretch. Even though there have been so many stories to tell...

Footsteps Worth Following

I’m thinking about my grandma today. Well, I think about her everyday, but today she is especially on my mind because after listening to the baseball game with her on Sunday night, I am missing her and wanting more…

My grandma Gen (my namesake) is 96 years old and she continues to be a shining example of how to live life well. She is fortunate to still have the good health that enables her to live in her own home – the place where she raised my mom and where she held my grandpa when he died 17 years ago.

In the last few years she has started to noticeably slow down (naturally), but yet we are always greeted with cookies on the kitchen table and the candy dishes are always stocked. Not that we need the sweets, but they exemplify her welcoming personality.

I love to watch my kids interact with her – separated by two generations, yet the connection is just as strong. There is no hesitancy in their hugs and kisses for great grandma. Why would there be? She is simply wonderful.

Over the years – since I’ve been old enough to recognize how truly special my grandma is – I’ve paid attention to how she lives her life to the fullest.

She has fun – I am smiling thinking of some of the fun times we’ve had together. Just a few years back grandma acted out “Dirty Dancing” in a game of charades in her dining room. I remember how hard she laughed when she realized that the curtains were open and the neighbors may have seen. And I’ll never forget when we went to see the movie Titanic and she loudly told me in the quiet of the theater that she would have done the same thing as Monica Lewinski if she had the chance! I really could go on and on about how fun my grandma is. When she skips a party she is always greatly missed.

She is active – My grandma still goes out to get her hair done every week and does her own grocery shopping. She plants flowers and keeps her house up. Of course she has some help now, but she doesn’t sit back – she is still involved in everything and wouldn’t have it any other way. Up until she stopped driving a couple years back, she drove the “old ladies” to church every Sunday (I think they were about 15 years younger than her).

She has strong relationships – My grandma has a lot of friends who visit and call – and it’s not just to check up on her. She has clearly invested considerable effort to her relationships over the years and there are so many of us who keep her in the front of our minds all the time. Sometimes I can’t reach her for hours because I get a busy signal every time I dial.

She eats well – It is all about balance. My grandma eats small amounts throughout the day. She likes sweets, but doesn’t have too many. She enjoys a strong drink now and then. She has always watched her weight and she doesn’t eat many processed foods. The bottom line is she takes care of herself.

She keeps her mind sharp – The newspaper is read cover-to-cover every day and she watches at least two news casts regularly. She asks me about if I’ve been to new restaurants and she is often the one catching me up on the latest happenings around town. She still votes in every election and she makes up her own mind about who she is choosing and why – and she’s not afraid to try to influence your opinion! She also tells wonderful stories from throughout her life. I am always amazed by the details she remembers – the names of people and places and the years when things happened. Her stories never grow old.

She is spiritual – My grandma has never been preachy, but she is solid in her beliefs and practices them. She finds peace in being guided by a higher power. She is very centered.

Cleary the way my grandma has chosen to live her life has had an impact on the quality of life she’s enjoyed. In the book “The Blue Zone: Lessons for Living Longer From People Who Have Lived the Longest,” author Dan Buettner shares similar stories as examples of lives well lived. It is an interesting walk through several different cultures and how they have practiced certain principles that have led to long healthy lives. Since publication in 2008, many people – even whole communities – have followed the lead as part of the Blue Zones Vitality Project. It is exciting to see this growing focus on healthy living.

When I read the book when it was first released, it immediately made me think of my grandma. How blessed I am to have grown up with her as my role model!

I love you, grandma.

As Seasons Change

We had our first notable snow fall of the season today. My initial reaction - which I heard echoed in murmurs of disgust by many others - was: "Where did summer go? How could it be gone so fast?"

That feeling of time slipping through my fingers seems to accelerate each year.

Much-anticipated events are now fond memories; times I thought I couldn't live through are now badges of courage and strength; and the faces in my daily life have changed and changed again - literally and figuratively.

Naturally, this feeling is most prominent when I look at my children. My babies who are no longer babies!

My son, my youngest child, is two and a half. I listen to him speaking in intelligent sentences and watch him keeping up with his older sisters and it hurts my heart a little. I want to keep his tiny hand enclosed in my palm in hopes that it won't grow larger if I just hold on tight.

The seasons keep changing, but fortunately the rapid pace has taught me a thing or two about perspective - about what and who are important. It's that time-tested wisdom that now keeps me from complaining too much about a snow fall. A beautiful one at that.

Saving Money By Saving The Planet

My family is very budget conscious right now, but fortunately many of the things we can do to save money are also good for the environment. All of these things are so easy to put into action and doubly beneficial!

Save energy
· Adjust your thermostat a few degrees.
· Install compact fluorescent light bulbs.
· Unplug appliances or use power strips when not using them.
· Turn off the lights when you leave the room.
· Turn down the heat or turn off the air conditioner when you’re not at home.
· Wash clothes in cold water.

Save water
· Use a reusable water bottle filled with filtered tap water.
· Water plants with rain water collected in containers in your garden.
· Take shorter showers.
· Skip watering the grass and washing the car.

Save paper
· Use both sides of every sheet of paper.
· Write lists and notes-to-self on the backs of envelopes or junk mail.
· Don’t print unless you have to.
· Read online instead of printed magazines and newspapers.
· Pay bills online.

Save gas
· Take the bus to work.
· Walk or take a bike for short distances.

Who knew living tight was such a great thing?! Even better, my kids are excited to help out because they care about saving the planet (it is a little harder to get them jazzed about saving money).

A Really Good, Very Bad Day

Yesterday I was having a bad day. I was way overly tired and a lot of things seemed to not be going my way. I was also feeling sad for a couple of my friends who are going through hard times. I cried a little and was just generally down.

But then...
My friend Laura invited me into her office and let me pour it all out.
My friend Jenn checked in on me twice.
My friend Wade made me laugh.
My friend Jill pretended I wasn’t acting crazy.
My kids snuggled with me on the couch.
My husband let me go to bed before the kids were even down.
My kitty joined me under the covers.

I went to sleep with a smile on my face feeling like one lucky girl. That I most definitely am.

Saved by the Super Kids

I love this photo of my kids in their Halloween costumes. I love that they worked together to coordinate costumes. I love that they planned their little pose themselves. I love how happy they look and how happy they make me.

This photo is the current home screen on my Blackberry, which is my constant sidekick. I can't tell you how many times I have glanced down at it during a busy day at work and smiled. Every time I look at this picture my Super Kids save me from whatever I may be stressing over.

Pictures are so great that way. Little memory keepers that have a way of bringing us back like nothing else.

I am not a scrapbooker and I don't have an organized system for my photos, but I still enjoy them fully. There are snap shots framed all over my home and office and I proudly share with my friends on facebook regularly.

Another of my favorite ways to use pictures is as bookmarks. Each time I open my book I get a chance to bring that special memory back. I usually select pictures as bookmarks that aren't quite right for framing, but they mean something special to me.

Once my Super Kids picture is replaced in the place of honor on my phone it may just make it to a frame. I think this one is a long-time keeper!

My Furry Little Homemakers

It goes like this: in a matter of a month my husband lost his job, I started working what seems like a million hours a week, the girls began the new school year, and we pulled the little guy from childcare – sudden household insanity!

So what did we do? We got cats.

We adopted two-year-old siblings Simo, a fat, playful tabby, and Celia, a shy, little tortoise shell calico.

We are quite aware what some of our friends and family are thinking. They wonder why, when we have a so many things going on and a loss of income, would we take on the additional responsibility of pets.

Why? We needed them a whole lot more than they needed us.

Simo and Celia are great companions to my husband and son when they are home all day, every day. They are playmates for the kids. They are great cuddlers and listeners when we are having a tough day. They even helped the kids forget that we had to cancel our family vacation.

I can’t even tell you how much they have given us already in the three short weeks we’ve had them.

There are numerous studies claiming pet owners are less stressed and less likely to suffer depression than non-pet owners. In her article, “How Owning a Dog or Cat Can Reduce Stress,” Elizabeth Scott, M.S., offers these reasons:
• Pets Can Improve Your Mood
• Pets Control Blood Pressure Better Than Drugs
• Pets Can Help With Social Support
• Pets Stave Off Loneliness and Provide Unconditional Love
• Pets Can Reduce Stress—Sometimes More Than People

I really didn’t need to look that up. Simo and Celia aren’t our first pets. Our family included two cats named Cody and Misti up until two years ago, when we sadly lost them both to separate illnesses within a few months. They had been so important to us and we grieved their loss so much that it took us this long to be ready to welcome new cats into our family.

But we knew it was time now. We all needed each other – it was a perfect match. They are helping us feel quite centered at home at a time when change could have easily overcome us. It is very nice to have a family of seven once again.

I Bow Down to Organized Audrey

I have an idol. I’ve met her once, I’ve heard her speak, I’ve bought her books and read them many, many times, and I’ve attempted to put them into action even many more times than that. I look up to this woman because no matter how hard I try, I am not anything like her. And I really want to be.

She is Audrey Thomas, founder of Organized Audrey. She is a home organization expert.

There are a lot of great things about my home. It is bright and open. It is surrounded by lovely trees. It is occupied by the people I love. It has plenty of space for us and our things. It really is a good place to live.

But organized it is not.

I have stacks of papers on my kitchen counter, laundry baskets of clothes in my bedrooms, toys overflowing every room, piles of dirty laundry waiting to be washed and closets stuffed floor to ceiling with, well, stuff. I can’t even guess how much time is wasted in my house looking for things we can’t find and how much energy is wasted feeling frustrated about the mess.

I reveal all this as a sort of therapy. It’s like I’m at my first Disorganized Anonymous meeting and I’m shyly standing up to admit to the crowd: “Hi, I’m Jen, and I’m disorganized.”

The time has come to change. But this isn’t my first time trying. Many more times than once I have worked really hard to get everything the way I want it (or at least close) and have kept it that way for two, maybe three weeks, and then I fall off the wagon again. I like to blame it on lack of time as a busy working mom of three, but I know an excuse doesn’t change the fact that it is as it is and I don’t like it.

So, send me good vibes, say a little prayer, or however you can support me, please. I’m going to try again.

I remember when I heard Audrey speak once she made a big point about not trying to do it all at once, but instead changing little habits one at a time. I trust her, so I will follow that advice.

So, first I’m going to tackle the paper in my kitchen. Audrey told a great story about a woman who had once called on her for help with this very issue. She had a gorgeous, clean house, but her double ovens were completely stuffed with papers. She had shoved it all in there once when company was coming and then just kept adding to it. (The story helped me feel so much better – at least my ovens are free of paper!)

Audrey’s solution to all the paper is using a hanging file box with separate files for all the different types of topics appropriate for your family. One for the school, one for church, one for sports, one for bills, one for take-out menus and coupons, one for each person’s personal stuff, ect. I actually attempted this a year or two ago and it worked great for a while. BUT, I had failed to take Audrey’s advice on one point – she said to not buy the pretty small file – to get the great big one. I went for the small, it got too stuffed and then we stopped using it.

I bought the big file box now and we will start again. I am committed. I am going to use this week to focus my energy, re-read some of the Organized Audrey books and get the family on board. My goal is to turn my home into more of a haven before the snow flies.

Thanks for your fabulous solutions and guidance, Audrey! You (and your ways) are always welcome in our home!

Healthy Food, But Are the Containers Killing Me?

On top of thinking about what I’m putting into my body, lately I’ve also been thinking a lot about what I’m putting my food and drink into. It really freaks me out to read that the plastic bottles and sippy cups I used with my kids may cause cancer and that the aluminum water bottle I constantly used could cause neurological disorders.

Is anything safe these days?

There don't seem to be any issues with glass and stainless steel, so that’s what I'm going with.

First off, I ditched most of our plastic dishes and cups and we are using glass, which we already used aside from the kids’ stuff. I have to admit that I wasn’t sad to part with the dishes decorated with princesses and animals – cute, but time to go. The kids didn’t even seem to notice. I found tempered glass kidishes by Duralex for the kids online, which I am very excited about.

I also got rid of most of our plastic storage containers, although I still use some #2 plastic containers with dry goods for sending the kids food to school. I figure it is still better than contributing plastic bags to the land fills. I just don’t put them in the dishwasher or microwave them. (In fact the only plastic I ever microwave is the occasional Lean Cuisine when I am really desperate – nobody’s perfect, right?) Also, I have been reading about waxed paper bags for school lunches which I need to check out – sounds like another potential good option for the kids.

Next, I bought each member of the family a Klean Kanteen stainless steel water bottle to use throughout the day. I love them! They are durable, the water doesn’t get a metallic taste and they are super light weight. More importantly, we don’t have to worry about chemicals like BPA. Plus, I like how the Klean Kanteen wide mouths are easy for cleaning.

Finally, I am slowly replacing a lot of my cookware. Because my budget is tight I haven’t been able to jump on this as quickly and instead have been replacing one piece at a time (and trying to mostly only use the new stuff). Maybe this is a good excuse to finally get to build a collection of the All-Clad stainless cookware I’ve been wanting for years!

I figure that making these small changes is the least I can do for my health and my family. There are so many things I can’t control, so why not do my best with the things I can!

Farm Fresh

I feel really lucky to live and work where I have easy access to working farmland, orchards and robust farmers markets. Three seasons a year I have access to the freshest of locally grown vegetables and fruit. I hardly have to go to the grocery store and it is so easy to get the kids to make healthier food choices.

I work in downtown Minneapolis, where every Thursday the Minneapolis Farmer’s Market spans several blocks down Nicollet Mall. Each week I ride the bus home with a big bag full of seasonal goodness to kick off the weekend well.

Today I picked up a ton of gorgeous sweet corn, crisp green beans and some beautiful ripe tomatoes. My mouth is watering just thinking about the barbeque we’ll have tomorrow! I also picked up some fresh catnip as a treat for my kitties. Is it wrong that I supply drugs for my animals?

On the weekends we like to get the kids involved when we can. We spent last Sunday at Whistling Well Farm picking apples fresh from the trees and running around with the resident dog and chickens. It was such a wonderful way to relish the beautiful autumn afternoon and we went home with bags of delicious souvenirs to enjoy through the week. I can’t wait for prime Honeycrisp season to start in two weeks!

I am filling my body (and my freezer) with all the fresh goodness I can while the getting is good. Squash and pumpkins next – YUM!

Fitting Good Food Into Little Time

In my dream life I have a personal chef. He whips up perfectly delicious and nutritious meals for the family and there are always readily available healthy snacks when we need them.

Realty: As I write this I am eating a pre-made frozen lasagna out of a plastic tray that I just zapped with radiation. Mmmmm. I try not to make a habit out of this, but we are a beyond busy family and we usually eat what is easiest to grab. The trick is making sure the most accessible food is actually satisfying and good for us, so we’ve been working a lot on meal planning in our house lately.

We’ve found that the key to healthy, happy eating is involving the kids in the planning. Kids always enjoy food more when they feel like they had a hand in it. I don’t bring the kids to the grocery store with me (so I can stick to a list), but we do sit down together to prepare the shopping list.

Although it may sound like more work to involve the kids, it eliminates any arguments or decisions at meal times – and the kids love to be part of it. In the end, by planning together we end up with more time around the table enjoying the food together.

Additionally, we’ve been doing more to encourage the kids to take an interest in their personal nutrition. My five-year-old daughter really likes to eat and wasn’t blessed with a fast metabolism – it was quickly evident that we needed to help her make smart decisions at a young age or she could be plagued with weight struggles and potential health issues for life.

I’ve found the best tool to use with the kids is the good old fashioned Food Pyramid from the United States Department of Agriculture. The government-run website www.mypyramid.gov offers a tremendous amount of valuable information, including printables that you can hang right on your fridge for the kids to see every time they are choosing a snack. Tools and information vary by age group, so you can find the best suited resources for your family.

We refer to the Food Pyramid when planning our grocery lists and selecting our daily food choices. The kids enjoy the challenge of meeting the goals established on the Pyramid (which can be customized by person on the website):

Grains
Make half your grains whole
Eat 6 oz. every day

Vegetables
Vary your veggies
Eat 2 ½ cups each day

Fruits
Focus on Fruits
Eat 2 cups every day

Milk
Get your calcium-rich foods
Get 3 cups every day

Meat & Beans
Go lean with protein
Eat 5 ½ oz. every day

I guess the Food Pyramid is all just common sense. But really, common sense is what healthy eating is all about – natural food from the earth is always going to be healthier than food manufactured by humans. Still, it is nice to have the Pyramid’s system to follow – especially for the kids.

I am absolutely tickled when my kids say things like “mom, you need to add a protein to my lunch” or “I don’t think we’ve had enough orange vegetables this week.” Such good little stewards of health! Lucky they’re not here right now to witness this microwaved lasagna.

It's Daddy Time!

I never expected to be the one working parent in a household of five, but you roll with the punches in life and - with a good attitude - it all works out.

I actually think it is pretty cool that my husband gets to spend this special time with our two-year-old son while I’m at work and the girls are at school. He is potty training the little guy (yippee!) and yesterday they spent the whole morning at the hockey rink together.

BUT (a big but), sometimes it is really hard to be the one at work missing out on all the kid stuff. This week I have been seeing my children an average of two hours per day, and that is mostly filled with homework, bath time, etc.

Last night it all came down on me when I went to put my boy down to bed and his response was “I want daddy! Why don’t you just go to work, mom!” My heart broke in two. Clearly I’m not the only one who has noticed the role reversals in our house.

I’m trudging on, but I don’t think I’ll ever forget that moment. At least I can use it to remind me to make the most of every single minute I do have with him. I can’t have the quantity right now, so I’m going to go for the quality – big time!

The Challenge

It seems to all be piling up lately. My husband lost his job, some of my friends seem a bit too distant, and my kids are going back to school (my second off to kindergarten – I can’t believe it!). I think the hardest thing, really, is that I feel too busy to really sit back and properly assess any of this.

Somehow, in the midst of it all, I am supposed to just keep chugging away busy as ever at work, kids’ activities, responsibilities and all. How am I supposed to manage the situations – or my emotions, for that matter – when I feel like I hardly have time to acknowledge them? Instead, for the moment, I am wallowing. I am feeling sorry for myself. I hate this. I feel like I’m not me.

I sent an email to my dear friend this morning and asked her if the way I am feeling is normal. She assured me it was. But, of course, she’s my friend, so I trust her on every topic except for honest assessments of myself. But then she sent me a link to one of her friend’s blogs and I was comforted (yet saddened) by reading Tears, by Jennifer Griffin-Wiesner. Thank you for sharing, Jennifer. I guess we’re both normal! And we are not alone.

Still, how do I break out of this? How do I slow down enough to evaluate and repair? I know that time alone won’t heal me – that I’ve learned the hard way.

Maybe it is far more than a coincidence that today is the first day in the Cardio Challenge that I have agreed to tackle with friends. We are competing against each other to exceed weekly mileage goals running, rowing and biking. I have been slacking on exercise lately, but I couldn’t resist my friend’s enthusiasm in developing this friendly competition. And I can’t think of a better time to jump back into gear. I know that the endorphins won’t hurt a bit, but better yet, I look forward to using my exercise time as an opportunity to think through these things happening in my life and plan for the next steps ahead.

I am optimistic that it will all be clearer with my running shoes on. And I’m pretty sure that I will find me again somewhere along the road.

The Belligerent Optimist

The tone of my blog may be changing a bit. Hopefully this will be a very temporary disruption. My husband lost his job yesterday. Yes, this disgusting economy continues to take its toll. And if you’ve read my previous post about money, you know that this loss of income will be more than a minor inconvenience for my family.

Obviously, I will keep working hard and earning a living the best I can. But what else can I do to help my family get through this? At the very least, I owe it to my kids not to let this situation turn us into miserable people.

I will be the belligerent optimist. I am going to fight all the negativity that keeps creeping in as if my life depended on it. In some ways, I think it does.

Unfortunately a positive attitude won’t change the facts if we can’t pay the bills, but it can help me deal with the reality. The bottom line is that I know my close relatives and good friends will not let my family starve or end up living in a box. Times may not be easy, but they could be much worse. We have it so good in so many ways – health, love, freedom – to name a critical few.

I pledge not to dwell, but facing my family’s crisis on these pages may just be the best therapy to get me through this nightmare. As I write about my commitment to strength, I believe it. And I know very soon there will be plenty of good news to share.

Medicine of the Mind, Indeed

Last month I went on a canoe trip that went horribly wrong. The bears ate our food, I got sick with a fever, and we were stuck in the middle of the wilderness because the weather was too bad to get out. There were moments when I wondered if we were ever going to make it home. Two things got me through it: my friend Andrea’s amazing sense of humor and my iPod. Seriously, I don’t know how I would have endured those long nights with the storms and bears threatening outside the thin nylon walls without headphones in my ears. And it wasn’t just the noise blocking out the sound of the wind – it was the music comforting my soul.

I have always been entranced by music. Maybe it goes back to the Lionel Richie records my parents used to spin or the John Denver my dad used to strum on his acoustic. I eventually started my own stack of albums – Michael Jackson and Journey come to mind. As a teen, my brother introduced me to Pink Floyd, REM, Jane’s Addiction and other epic bands that started to sculpt my true appreciation of music and who I am as a person.

My life became a connect-the-dots journey from show to show. From Prince to The Dead, I couldn’t get enough. Big, small, local, international – I had to experience them all.

That’s the thing with live music – it truly is an experience. It goes beyond hearing and seeing the performers – you become part of the music along with the crowd around you. Nothing compares. I am now the 35-year-old who may stand out among the teenage fans, but I’m still there! Granted, not nearly as often, but I can never go too long without getting my fix.

Live music addiction aside, my point is that music in general, even through the ear phones, is truly essential to my being. It pumps me up, chills me down, keeps me company, opens new worlds, bonds me with like-minded people. It is my muse and my constant companion.

My current tastes trend more on the mellow side. Jason Mraz is my favorite. Newer comers Matt Nathanson and James Morrison are also a great pleasure. Old favorites like Bob Mould and The Dead have a regular place on my play lists. And, of course, I still like to keep my heart young with some good dance tunes and a little bit of funky once in a while. I recently went to a spectacular Lily Allen show and felt 18 again.

Writing about music feels kind of like writing about your family. You could go on and on and on, but the subject is so personal that nobody probably cares. How can you really express love on paper? So, I conclude with a favorite quote...

Music's the medicine of the mind. ~John A. Logan

Hula Hooping Through Life

I have decided to make exercise part of my life. My first order of business is quitting the gym. That's right - I quit. How can I really be a fit example for my children when going to the gym means dropping them in the childcare? Instead, I am going to find ways to truly integrate exercise into our routine so we will all enjoy and benefit.

Today was a good start. We took a walk to the playground. The older kids walked and I pushed the little guy and picnic lunch in the double stroller. We took the long cut around the pond and then the kids ran through the field and I pushed the stroller across the grass. Let me tell you, pushing a double stroller across an uncut field is better than any exercise machine I've ever tried! At the play ground I pushed the kids on the swings and did a little swinging myself. Back at home we cranked up the music in the back yard and danced and hula hooped. I'm still a pretty good hooper - and my abs loved the hip shaking!

I think this is going to work! I did a little googling and at 120 pounds here's how many calories I would burn doing the following activities for just 20 minutes, according to the Fitness Partner Connection:

• Bicycling: 12-13.9 mph, leisure, moderate effort - 145.4
• Dancing: disco, ballroom, square, line, Irish step, polka - 81.8
• Frisbee: general - 54.5
• Rope Jumping: general, moderate - 181.8
• Swimming: general, leisurely, no laps - 109
• Walk: 2 mph (30 min/mi) - 45.4
• Gardening: weeding - 81.8
• Watering plants, by hand - 45.4
• Child-care: bathing, feeding, etc. - 54.5
• Playing w/kids: vigorous effort - 90.9
• Child games: moderate, hop-scotch, jacks, etc. - 72.7

Compared to the 90-130 calories for the aerobics I used to do, not too shabby! More time with my kids, fitness for the whole family and the same health benefits. I am suddenly really excited about exercise.

I'm off to weed the garden and then gather the troops for a bike ride...

Money Can't Buy Me Love

The downward economy has caused me to do a lot of thinking about the role that money and material things play in my life. I would like to say I have the upper hand in my relationship with money, but I will admit there definitely has been a power struggle between us sometimes.

I never thought about money until college. I went to a private university with a lot of wealthy kids (or kids of wealthy people, which apparently makes the kids wealthy as well) and was quickly introduced to a new standard of “normal.” Not only did my friends have designer clothes and endless party money, they also had cabins, condos in Florida and other really fun things that I didn’t mind being part of. My friends shared, so money was fun!

As I got older and we started to get careers, houses and families of our own, the pressure to keep up with the Joneses became a vise grip. Dinner parties were actually an opportunity to show off the latest home improvement projects, golf outings were at the country club and kids birthday parties seemed more like carnivals. My husband and I quickly got into the ugly mindset of always wanting more and never being content with what we had. So what did we do? What so many Americans have done – we tried to keep up whether we could afford it or not.

It was all fine until my husband’s income dropped substantially and we couldn’t pay our bills. No rich parents to bail us out. Times were tough for a long while and we are still paying the price catching up.

Fortunately, I can say that we learned our lesson. We’ve been pulling ourselves up by our boot straps and living a pretty darn good life within our means.

We don’t have a condo in Florida, but we do have a local beach that our three wonderful kids love to play at.

We don’t have a cabin, but we do have this awesome tent that sleeps eight and has a screen porch on the front.

We don’t have endless party money, but Trader Joes has pretty good wine and my husband is a great cook.

Best of all, we’ve learned a lot about what’s truly important and know that all that really matters is that we have each other. Even without all the extras, we still have love. (Cheesy, yes, but true.)

That said, my husband and I have learned one final lesson that I would like to share: If you are a poor kid attending a rich college, don’t fall in love with the one other poor kid at the school. In other words, in times of trouble, remember your sense of humor – it goes a long way! : )

Home Not-So-Sweet Home

I can hear my three kids in the other room fighting over the wii. There is probably nothing that I dislike more than the sound of them arguing (except maybe the sound of the video games). It is a particularly harsh sound right now because we just got back from a beautiful day in the country visiting family. My husband's uncle and aunt live on a hobby farm and from their lovely little white house you can see nothing but grass-covered hills and an old red barn that has seen better days, but fits perfectly into the picturesque view. I felt so wonderfully at peace watching my kids running through the fields and rolling down the hills with their cousins. I was relaxed in the fact that I didn't have to watch too closely because there was really nothing of danger around and I especially loved that they were happily entertaining themselves with really nothing but each other and the beauty around them.

But now we're home. I hadn't finished unpacking the car and the video games were already on and the bickering had begun. So now I'm sitting here wondering why. What is it about our home that seems to bring out the worst in them? Are they simply exhausted from a big day? Did they use up all their good behavior around the relatives? Is it the video games that makes them instant animals? Are they just being kids? I am trying to get to the heart of it. I think a peaceful home is the foundation of a lovely life, so it is probably the best place to start.

For now, I'm going to try to get them away from the wii and out into the garden. Maybe they will listen to mother nature better than they listen to me. It sure seemed to work up at the farm.